Movie Recommendation: Manorama Six Feet Under

Tweet

Note: I love mystery thrillers! Of late, very few movies in Bollywood are of this genre. The latest I have liked was Kahaani. So imagine my surprise when I bump into one of those lesser known, offbeat thrillers in Bollywood. What a treat!

IMDB Entry: Manorama Six Feet Under

Genre: Mystery, Suspense, Thriller

Firstly, I would like to say, if you are expecting too much action, big star cast and some Bollywood style melodrama and production values, you might as well stay clear of this movie. Although I do consider Abhay Deol as not only a big star but a seal of approval for offbeat movies (going by his track record of Dev D, Oye Lucky Lucky Oye, Ek Chaalis ki Last Local...). So if you are willing to consider an offbeat, suspense movie in a rustic setting, look no more. This is one of those niche movies.

The movie takes place in a sleepy town of Lakhot, Rajasthan. Abhay Deol plays Satyaveer, a bored middle class resident who works at the local municipality as a Junior Engineer. His wife Nimmi (played by Gul Panag), plays a nagging housewife who loves her TV serials and taunts his husband for the middle class lifestyle. Satyaveer's passion is writing but unfortunately his first book "Manorama" (a detective novel) reminds him of his failure as a writer (the book sells only 200 copies). He is so disappointed by its failure, that he does not own even a single copy of his own book. One day, he is approached by a minister's wife, also called Manorama (played by Sarika) who is suspicious that her husband is having an extra marital affair. She pays him to investigate as a private detective and take pictures of his affair, so she can gather evidence about his adultery. 

What follows is an intriguing plot where Satyaveer gets implicated in a double homicide, suicide of Manorama and a missing girl child from a local orphanage. The rest of the plot is how he connects the dots and solves the mystery.

Abhay Deol, is definitely one of the most underrated actors in Indian film industry. He gives life to the character of Satyaveer - both as a passionate detective and as a disappointed writer and husband. The rural setting of the Rajasthan town works well for the story and gives an authentic feel. The movie is slow at times, but picks up pace in the second half. The movie has plenty of good old fashioned detective thrills to it and also at the same time keeps you guessing - very unpredictable storyline. The movie runs on the stellar performances from Abhay Deol, Gul Panag and the supporting cast. I was surprised to see Nawazuddin Siddiqui in an insignificant role as a local goon - but I guess he got more popular only after Kahaani and Gangs of Wasseypur. He is definitely an actor to watch out for.

This movie is not fast paced so it is not a stylish action thriller and nor is it a modern one at that. It is a simple story with the right amount of creepiness and mystery that will keep you hooked if you are ok with its slackish pace in the first half. But I also think that is one of the reasons that make a mystery movie worth a watch - the slow unfolding of characters and sub-stories that add to the plot make it intriguing and suspenseful. Plus, this movie is set in a small town and going by that it has to be slow and uneventful. As a middle class Indian, I could really connect with some social issues that stand out in the movie - the way your neighbors pry on your privacy, small town corruption, greed and the rich poor inequality.

The movie, it seems is inspired by Roman Polanski's Chinatown (I haven't seen that movie yet), but I really don't care because the storytelling has been adapted perfectly for an Indian setting. This movie is a must-watch for mystery buffs! 

Is literacy rate the answer to everything?

Tweet

Not long ago, there was a discussion at work about the direct co-relation of literacy rate with sex ratio in India. The premise being that higher literacy rate meant higher sex ratio (because the literate did not discriminate against female child). This is not true always. In fact, it is opposite in some cases.

For eg: Haryana has been in news for a higher crime rate against women and the declining female sex ratio. The literacy rate in Haryana (76.64%) is higher than my home state of Andhra Pradesh (67.66%) and yet the sex ratio in Haryana (877 females for every 1000 males) is much lesser than Andhra Pradesh's (992 females for every 1000 males).

This data is picked up from India's Census Website and represents the year 2011.

Movie Recommendation: 500 Days of Summer

Tweet

Note: You know how when someone asks you during lunch table conversation - "What's your favorite movie?" and you are taken aback. Because you know you have seen so many damn good movies, but cant seem to remember even one, at the time! Well, this one counts as one of my favorite movies...and will remember to mark it so in my memory :)

IMDB Entry: 500 Days of Summer

Genre: Romantic Comedy

This movie is pretty much summed up by its opening lines:

"This is a story of boy meets girl. But you should know up front, this is not a love story."

I will be honest, the first time I saw this movie I didn't think much of it. But the second time I saw, I realized it was cleverly made for a rom-com movie. I have been a rom-com movie fan for a long time. Specially the Nora Ephron kinds. (You know, The Harry Met Sally, Sleepless in Seattle, You've Got Mail types?) The type that leaves you with a warm fuzzy feeling. Of late, I have lost interest in this genre. Because every movie in this genre is a rehash of known rom-com hits. So if you are a man and reading this right now, don't stop reading. Because this movie is nothing like a usual rom-com that focusses only on girls and their fairy tale stories. Yes, it has the "cute" moments, but equal parts of the movie are also focussed on the guy. And here it is the guy who believes in true love, marriage and happy ever after.

Joseph-Gordon Levitt plays Tom, your average guy next door, passing away his time in a greeting card company where he devices corny captions for cards. Although he is an aspiring architect, he is quite comfortable leading his life this way. He strongly believes he will meet his true love someday. The new copier girl, Zooey Deschanel as Summer, arrives and Tom believes she's the one for him. The two start dating.

The movie also follows a very non-linear narrative,  journaling 500 days of their relationship - which I thought was a refreshing way of narrating a story. Because really in life and relationships, all things bittersweet are non-linear. You go through highs and lows, laughs and fights and they are never really coherent. The movie is sprinkled with songs (yes! kinda like Bollywood movies) that gives it a "Glee" like look in parts. But they aren't disruptive and flow well with the narrative. In fact, some of the songs (I never heard of before), became my favorites from this movie.

There are a few elements that work in this movie -  its "close to reality" portrayal of a relationship that starts from the blossoming of love to periods of confusion and fights due to the pair's diametrically opposite views on love. This movie will relate with guys who have gotten their hearts broken and eventually went after their dreams and moved on.

The lead actors share a great chemistry - so believable that at some point in the movie, you really want their relationship to work out. The cinematography is brilliant and well thought out. For example, in one of the songs the color coordination is blue to match Zooey's blue eyes.



All said, in every movie I look for a story and the storytelling. And I think this movie was a good attempt in telling the usual love story in a clever way - heartbreaking and hopeful, just like life. This movie definitely grows on you - I have liked it more the second or the third time I watched. 

And no, I don't think Summer is a b****. What did you think?

iTerm2 + Tmux Integration

Tweet

I often "ssh" to remote servers from my Macbook and have found tmux (terminal multiplexer) to be invaluable. This saves me a lot of anxiety about disconnected remote sessions. 

However, I use iTerm2 (replacement for OS X Terminal) and have always wanted for tmux to work within iTerm2. You can read all about the iTerm2 and tmux integration and why this integration helps.

Here are notes on how you can install tmux to work with iTerm2. Assumption is that you have iTerm2 already setup on Mac:

Movie Recommendation: Little Miss Sunshine

Tweet

Note: So I ate too much food tonight (read "fried food") and I am still awake and this germ of an idea comes to mind. Why not blog about movies I have seen and liked? You know, like the lesser known ones. So this is my first entry - let's see how far I keep this act going :)

IMDB entry: Little Miss Sunshine
Genre: Drama, Comedy

Image Courtesy: Fan art from fanpop.com

Once in a while I come across movies that I know nothing about and yet the title makes me all judgmental about it. I mean, Little Miss Sunshine. What do you expect? Some sappy, teenage romance or children book adaptation? You will be glad to know this isn't anything like that.

This takes an unexpected theme and weaves an intimate story around a dysfunctional family that comes together for their little daughter 'Olive' who has qualified for a beauty pageant called "Little Miss Sunshine". The family takes a road trip from Albuquerque to California (the venue for the pageant) in a beat-up van, so they can get Olive in time for the finals.

A grandfather addicted to crack and adult magazines, who cusses every time he speaks, an homosexual uncle who has attempted suicide, a father obsessed with an idea for a book on "winning", an overworked mother and a brother who has pledged silence and only communicates in the written word with the family - It cant get more dysfunctional than this. There is a scene in the movie where the van gets pulled over by the cops and the father says - "Everybody pretend to be normal" 



Through the trip, they face many troubles, live through each other's eccentricities; but quickly learn to rely on each other's support to get to the pageant. Olive and family, survive setbacks but are caught unawares when it becomes apparent that a beauty pageant for little girls can be as pretentious as the ones for adults. Will the plain and chubby looking Olive make it in the finals of the beauty contest?

The climax was one of the most unexpected yet delightful endings I could have envisioned for a movie like this. The casting is impeccable. At first look, the characters appear weird, but you start to feel one with them as the movie progresses. To a great extent, the movie signifies how people judge others by their appearance, their tastes, likes and dislikes. Perhaps, that is the reason, the movie mixes in eccentricity in the characters. You might not identify with the characters, but you know each of them has a purpose in the story.

My favorite character in the movie was the brother - Dwayne. He doesn't speak as he has taken a vow of silence until he gets into the Air Force. Towards the end of the movie, he shares a private moment with his uncle and vents out his frustration at the pageant venue -  

You know what? Fuck beauty contests. Life is one fucking beauty contest after another. School, then college, then work... Fuck that. And fuck the Air Force Academy. If I want to fly, I'll find a way to fly. You do what you love, and fuck the rest. 

Make no mistake - this not your usual cross country road trip sort of a movie. Nor is it all artsy and unrealistic. It might not even grab your eyeballs in the beginning. You will need to give it time to grow on you. But once you catch the pulse of the movie, it leaves you with a profound feeling on topics so diverse - family, death, dreams, setbacks - you will be craving to see what happens next. 

And no matter what, please don't miss the climax! :)

The No-Regrets Policy

Tweet

Sometimes (ok, most of the times) I get up in the morning and jump right into the morning rush. No prayers, no thank you's, no good mornings, no nothing. I am snoozing till the last nano second and then I am jumping out of the bed, right into the shower.

Not good.

The whole concept of a morning ritual struck me odd, for a really long time. My inner voice kept saying - "Really, look at that. All the fools going through an elaborate time in the morning doing stuff, when they could actually catch some precious snooze time." You know inner voice, you were wrong, all the way. The essence behind morning rituals is to look at yourself, reflect and set the pace for the day. I ask you, how many times has it happened that a bad start to the day resulted in a productive rest of the day? Zero, I can bet. Because you didn't set the tone for your day. You didn't speak to your mind and tell "Hey mind, I have done good so far. I am healthy, happy and wise so I thank God and family and friends for all the good things. Today is going to be rocking, as usual."

And then there is this whole "looking back" business. You know, looking back is always a tricky thing. You focus so much on the negatives, the wrong stuff that has happened. If only, that certain something, event or incident didn't happen.

Let me tell you something today. "If only" are the two most dangerous words. Ever.

Because you are looking at yourself in the mirror and saying things like -

"If only, my skin didn't break into pimples all the time."

"If only, I was not fat like this."

"If only, I hadn't splurged like that on food or shopping or whatever last night."

"If only, I had performed good enough to get that promotion at work."

"If only, I knew I was such an idiot then."

"If only, I didn't get into this relationship."

You get the drift. 

The problem with regretting is it continues in an infinite loop. Never ending self-inflicting physical and mental pain, becomes a habit. There are probably a thousand times when I said - "No I am not going to regret and feel self-pity." But you give up fighting and jump right into the regret loop. Because your mind is tuned to that.

Now, how the hell am I supposed to break this loop you ask?

I think, the answer (like everything else), lies in the way we form habits. By habits, I simply mean small changes. Instead of telling "I am not going to regret, why not form some habits that are going to change the regret filled regret behavior?"And that is why this whole brouhaha about morning rituals. Because really the people who are getting up in the morning a little early, and praying and spending time with family and kids or just meditating aren't fools. They are performing, right there, the ritual that breaks the regret loop (perhaps even unintentionally). 

The problem with rushing through your morning is you really give no time for your mind to find and hook onto something that will help you through a possibly nasty day. Then you are jumping from one task to another. You are getting sucked into the vortex of emotions that will make or break your day, without your permission (unbelievable how something else controls your life!). Is that how you want your life to be? Give it up, for some unknown entity to drive it. And then do self-bashing about things you could have achieved. If only?

Of course, looking back itself is not a one stop solution to regret. In fact it can morph into the problem itself. Because either you could look back and tell "Hey, I had a crappy X no. of years so far. What did I achieve?" or tell "Hey, I had the most beautiful X years so far. Beautiful and nasty experiences that have shaped my personality and I am ready for all the challenges"

So looking back is good, only to take you forward. The answer then, lies in habits - like the morning ritual. It sets the tone for your day. Even if it means 5 minutes of waking up early and counting your blessings, do it. Do it every single day. Don't break that chain. Slowly see that turn into a habit - like brushing your teeth or tying your shoe laces. It becomes mechanical and becomes a part of you. If need be, get someone to be your support system - friend, spouse, family, colleague, whoever. Someone who reminds you to get back in line. To keep your regret-free conditioning intact.

Regret is the single most evil thing that has happened to humans. It just gets worser and worser if ignored. I am a victim and I am stage three (no this is not even funny). I am ready to fight this, head on. 

It is astonishing how this whole "escape from stress and regret" thing is a multi billion dollar business. 

No amount of indefinite vacation or a 5 day yoga retreat is going to change your habit of regret. The only change that will make a dent in this is change - slow, consistent and sustainable change. 

You need to say to yourself - "Today is the most important day of my life. And I wont let it pass in regret for something that is already gone by. For some bullshit that you wouldn't even remember a few days from now."

If only I never used the two words - If only. (See I did that again! Regretting like that)

What Japanese anime can teach us

Tweet

My first introduction to Japanese anime happened when I visited a friend's place in Monterey. The place was breathtaking and homely at the same time (unlike the parts of California that people usually visit like San Francisco or Los Angeles). During this time, we spent most of our time doing fun little things - taking a stroll by the beach, cooking authentic Mexican dishes, eating Korean seafood rolls, discussing Steinbeck (who was a Monterey resident) and when night came, watching Japanese animation movies on VHS. Yes, VHS! It was very unlikely of me to choose animated movies as an evening watch, leave alone Japanese anime. 

Since I was not too keen, my friend had to trick me into liking anime. I had heard of Naruto and other Manga characters and the cult following it had in the States. But I was never inclined to give it a shot.

She was finding it difficult to choose between Princess Mononoke and Grave of the Fireflies. And then she chose the latter. Although she did warn me that Grave of the Fireflies is unlike most of the other Japanese anime (live action figures, magic castles, witches and spells and such). I, on the other hand, didn't bother since they all felt same to me at that time. And I gave in since her whole family was getting excited to watch the movie that night (apparently they watched it dozens of times already)

Grave of the Fireflies

Now, let me tell you how surprised and moved I was by the end of the movie. Grave of the Fireflies is about a brother and his little sister struggling to live in a World War II struck Japan. It was easily one of the most heartbreaking stories I ever watched. It is not easy to pour in words the kind of feelings it left me with. It took me a week to shake it off (and I am not even exaggerating). I have seen a lot of war movies and blood and gore, but this kind of storytelling was leagues ahead of them all.  Because it gets personal and leaves a deep influence on how you view the world around you. Most of the Hollywood movies, you blink and forget. Don't get me wrong I love Pixar movies, they are brilliant, but Japanese anime elevates stories to a personal level - the amount of soul, depth, authenticity and honesty, that is missing even in Pixar animations.

Since it left on me such a deep impression, my friend (a big fan of Hayao Miyazaki) insisted that I watch rest of his movies after I go back home. She lent me half a dozen DVDs of his movies and I was hooked for life. 

Now, this is the thing about Japanese anime (and in particular Miyazaki's) - it engages you so much through its simple storytelling that you feel one with it. I was pleasantly surprised by how every script subtlely weaves the importance of family and values with the theme of the story. They touch so many diverse topics - about growing up, respecting elders, being polite (even to strangers), not being judgmental, keeping faith, working hard, pursuing your dreams and cherishing life, no matter what.

Nowhere in the story I felt that they were making an effort to teach such important lessons. It just magically left me inspired on so many levels. Sometimes, I wonder if these movies left such an impact on me, then they most definitely should be made mandatory. Specially for children and teenagers who are at such an impressionable age.

Whisper of the Heart

When I watched Whisper of the Heart, for the first time ever, I was left inspired after watching a movie on teen romance! I mean who would have thought that could happen? Teen romance and inspiration - that is possible only in a Miyazaki tale.

Every scene, every moment depicted true to life - the emotions of first day at school to developing a crush on a boy, of friendships and trivial fights, studying for exams, the way the sky looks (and the rainbow) after it has rained, the smell of earth, the sound of crickets on a warm summer night, the way we nurture innocent dreams for our future, the infinite expectations your parents have of you, your journey of self discovery. A million such emotions in a 120 min length feature film is nothing short of awe-inspiring.

Seriously how much of that do you see in Hollywood or Bollywood movies? It is either mindless charade of popularity contests or excessive bullying or fancy product and brand placements and very little emphasis on how kids are sorting through their dreams, their everyday experiences and family relationships. What is with the culture of wannabes and trying to make premature adults out of kids, instead of letting them bloom in their creativity?

Apart from the story, the accompanying artwork and animation leaves me amazed  - it can't get more beautiful than this. Moments so stirring and wonderful, that they leave a lump in my throat. It makes me think why didn't anyone introduce me to these movies, a little earlier in my life? And for that, I am forever indebted to my friend.

The Ugly Truth

Tweet

It reminds me of the scene from A Few Good Men where Jack Nicholson is in a court-martial and is asked to tell the truth. And he goes "You can't handle the truth". And continues to deliver a monologue telling why exactly sometimes you have to live with the truth so ugly, that perhaps you are better off living without knowing it.

Last night, I was at a local clinic. The kind you find on a busy Indian street, neatly lined in a row of beauty parlors, neon-lit tiffin centres, medical stores, ATM outlets and the like. The clinic itself was a tiny establishment, with an assistant who was perhaps 70 year old guy himself, skinny to the bone seated on an old bamboo chair that seemed only as strong as the guy. He looked at me bleakly as I enquired, seated on my bike - "Is there a doctor?"

He looked sideways from me and opened his mouth so to speak. He was squinted. He coughed for a good 10 seconds. I fidgeted impatiently on my bike seat. Then he just nodded in reply.

In India you don't take people's word at first go. You always confirm - that's the rule of thumb. So my next impulse was to go inside the clinic and find for myself, if the doctor was around. He was. 

I ask him, without as much as a statutory greeting - "So are you going to be here? Till what time?"

He points at the clock on the cracked wall, a lizard sneaking in from behind. "9:30" he tells me, loudly,  in three languages - English, Hindi, Telugu. As I nod in return and get back to my bike I notice a few men giving me furtive glances. I am dressed in old jeans and a bright turquoise colored T-shirt with a golden print that said "Peace". You almost always get glances like that. Pretty or not, adequately clothed or not. So long as you are a woman, you will be stared at. And you almost always are immune to it.

I just continue to my bike and ride away to appear after a good 30 minutes. This time to see a long line of people in waiting. For a moment, I am infuriated. A third class, "hole in the wall" clinic with a doctor who doesn't even have a pen and pad to write prescriptions, is suddenly in demand. But statistics defy everything here. India's population density will assure every doctor an unending supply of patients looking for treatments from the common cold to body fractures.

I wait indefinitely in the line. Men still staring, but I give them a hard look and they feign looking towards the sky. I look the other way, and can see from the corner of my eye, their stares returning back to me. I mutter a curse or two, under my breath. Just a bit longer and I can go, I assure myself.

And finally, it is my turn. The doctor is now writing prescriptions on post-it notes. In between he gets up and disappears behind an old, strange smelling, floral printed curtain with a patient on the other side who has some kind of bowel problems, lying on the bed and grunting in pain. He comes back to write some antibiotics on the post-it notes. He asks me if I am married. I don't answer and almost open my mouth to say it is none of its business but just nod to say no. I want to just get out of this shit hole, I say to myself again.

He explains in three languages again about the medicines he is writing me. I look at my watch and get restless - I have a remote meeting to attend in an hour and I am not even listening to him at this point. I quickly try to grab the prescription (now a total of 4 post-its) but he looks at me questioningly and says -  "Where is the money, madam?"

I give him a 50 rupee note and head out. After scouting for medicines at 3 drug stores, I grow impatient and give up. Of all the fever antibiotics, he had to write me the least accessible ones, I think to myself.

Medical care is a big business here, like anywhere else in the world. A drug store doesn't just try to sell you drugs. They try to sell you only "certain brand" of drugs made by a "certain" pharmaceutical. So they are often trying to con you to take substitutes from pharma companies that pay them kickbacks for promoting their brand over others. But with all things India, you fight your way through it. Lets just say I had a bad day and wasn't open to any more drama for the day.

Failing to find the drugs, I am even more agitated this time. I rush back to the doctor, with the post-its in my hand, waving them furiously at the doctor's face and question him, grinding my teeth  - "No one carries half the prescriptions you have given me."

The doctor is mid-flight, half of his body behind the curtain and half out. He doesn't appear shocked, while standing firmly in front of a young guy, whose chest is in a pool of blood. That's when I look down and realized I am standing in what seemed to me like someone just spit out red paan on the floor.

That was instead a stream of human blood following the guy on the bed now. I turn now to see two of the young men (the ones who were giving me the stares about half an hour ago), one panicking and talking on the phone to hail an ambulance, while the other trembling, his hands drenched in blood.

My mouth turns dry. The doctor says to me - "One minute madam"

I step out for air, trying to take in what just happened. The 70 year old assistant looks at me quizzingly - "Did you try Vijayalakshmi (drug store)?" I am almost dazed and manage to say "No". He is squinted and tries his best to give me store directions.  I am confused and do my best to follow his gaze.

I turn back and I see "facebook" written on the back of the T-shirt of one of the men - a guy who is barefoot, doesn't carry a phone and doesn't even have enough money to give to the doctor. I hear the doctor console the guy - "Don't worry. Your friend will be OK. I know the doctor at this hospital, he will fix your friend for cheap."

I find my drugs at Vijayalakshmi. I return home with the medicines, check my emails and finish the remote call. And then get back to surfing the Internet.

The incident is now a faint memory. Life goes on. And that my friends is the ugly truth.

The Best of Times, The Worst of Times

Tweet

Be forewarned, this is not an easy video to see. I should've heeded to a similar warning from Jeff Atwood (his blog was where I came across this video). You will be left with mixed feelings - anger, grief, despair, helplessness and hours of contemplation about life and the curveballs it throws at us.

Safe to say, we all have had our share of best and the worst times in life. But having to experience them at the same time is not merely paradoxical, but heartbreaking and cruel. And this video showcases one of the greatest examples of human endurance - the courage to keep going, no matter what happens in life and to seek strength from the memories we have of our people.

And things like these makes me question - why do bad things happen to nice people? It makes me angry and sad. It makes me question the faith people have in God. My immediate impulse (like in the video) is to find someone to blame. But at the end of thinking (calmly) through this, only one thing comes to mind. 

That is, to really really cherish your present with people you love. A moment gone, is gone. You can never get that again. And to think that we have a long life to live and family and loved ones can wait is the biggest human folly. Ever.

Eat. Sleep. Rock. Repeat.

Tweet

A co-worker of mine once told me, casually over lunch, how she had gone about writing a personal manifesto. I nodded as if I understood and completely agreed. Of course, I had no clue until then. So I made a quick mental note to myself - "Read about this personal manifesto business. Perhaps I should make one of my own."

With that, I went about my day's work, as we all do. Forgetting our daily conversations comes easy to a human brain. But the brain is smarter than that, it stashes such "interesting" bits inside your subconscious mind and then magically retrieves them at a later point. So today when I heard about manifestos and the like in an unrelated chat, I was struck by the feeling of "deja vu".

Maybe it was time to make one. And stick to it. I have found over time that forming habits around your personal manifesto is a sure shot way to lead a happy life.

Courtesy: NYTimes article on Don't Indulge, Be Happy

I wanted my manifesto to be simple. So apart from preparing a "ten part" manifesto I wanted to give it a headline. Sort of like a reminder when times are bad. Something like this:

EAT. SLEEP. ROCK. REPEAT.

Elaborating on the "rock" part gives me this list (in no particular order):

1. Work hard. Nothing comes easy in life.

2. Fall in love, spend time with those you love and never take them for granted.

3. Spend more on experiences. Spend less on material things.

4. Let go. Make a fool of yourself.

5. Keep life simple - if you don't like something, change it.

6. Smile often. Smile genuinely.

7. Be grateful. Never forget those who have helped you.

8. Make time for your favorite physical activity. Your body needs endorphins. It is your way of saying "thank you" to your body.

9. Doing is better than not doing.

10. Believe in yourself. Always carve out some "me time" in your day - to reflect and rejuvenate yourself.

Really hard to stick to the above, but then life happens only once so why not give it a shot :-)

So what's your personal manifesto?

Tubelight ka Chaand

Tweet

A little boy called Tubelight and his obsession for the moon (chaand)

This poignant short film explores the dream of one little boy through the underbelly of Kolkata. 

And his dream to capture the moon. Is it possible then to pursue a lofty dream as that? 

This video serves as a great metaphor for "Follow your dreams"

No matter how hard life is, no matter what the obstacles, no matter how people may judge you - make your dream your obsession. 

Because obsession leads to single minded doggedness to pursue your dream and make it happen, no matter what. To dance in its tunes and sing in its praises, no matter what. To love it unconditionally and to want it more than anything, no matter what.

So what if it is the moon that you want? :-)

The Watercooler Gang

Tweet

Update: Now I remember where I first heard of this term : the watercooler gang

Are you one of the watercoolies? The kind who congregates near the water cooler in the break room and whines about something wrong at work?

Lets take a deep breath now. Are you done yet? Good. Now please nod your head in approval when I ask you the same question, again - "Are you or were you at sometime a watercoolie?" 

I see you just pursed your lips but slightly angled your head. Yeah, that's a good enough cue for a nod of approval. 

The thing about office whining is, it is seemingly innocuous, harmless as a fig we assume. The problem is, it just sort of becomes a habit in the long run. I have seen several people do this at one of my previous jobs. Not surprisingly, it is very off-putting and toxic. Because suddenly, even if a moment ago you weren't concerned about the topic of interest, you are now spending precious brain fuel on most probably something silly. Truth is negative people zap your energy. And more the watercooler talk the worser it gets.  It just never ends. There is no finish line to your laundry list of complaints.

Who would have thought a watercooler had so much power to dominate our thoughts, eh? It is the holy grail of friction and negativity at work.

Now now, I am not proposing that you make peace with every wrong thing at work. All I am saying is to wear some rose tinted glasses instead of blinders that obstruct your capacity to distinguish the right and the wrong. Because tinted glasses still allow you to see the visibly wrong things in your face. It is the far off, distant and trivial things that it seeks to hide. Point is, you decide for yourself if the trivial (negative) stuff matters to you at all. 

(For example) So what if someone just crushed a million people to make it to the top? That doesn't mean you go around bad mouthing or throwing a fit about it. Truth is if you don't agree to that sort of "work ethic", then you don't and you move on. But going on a crusade against that is going to do more harm to you than the concerned "tyrant" you are whining about.

Your individual happiness and sanity matters above all. If you have a serious problem with something, you deal with it. If the problem isn't in your control and it is purely circumstantial, you detach yourself from it, as quickly as you can. There is no point gathering a group of followers to just whine and lament about stuff all day, every day of the year. The watercooler group is not a support group, it is an energy zapping group. Your support is elsewhere - your confidante (your family, spouse, close friend or co-worker)

Unlike in math, two negatives don't make a positive. They just multiply instead. They snowball into one of the biggest distractions and frustrations of your life, unintentionally. So the next time you find a similar sight of the watercooler gang, avoid them. Best to partake of the water and zip right by them.

If life gives you cupcakes, you don't complain about the (invisible and unknown) tiered cake. You just eat the damn cupcakes, grin ear to ear and hum a song. 

No Soup for You

Tweet

If you are not from the Seinfeld generation, then a short reference here before we continue:

So the point, in short is, kindness is becoming way underrated in today's society. It is almost as if everyone in this world read the Steve Jobs biography and said to themselves - "Yes I could be an a*****, no problem!" Jobs just made the whole "being a jerk" thing classy and fashionable. Thanks Steve! Now I pray that belief doesn't spread more after they release the Ashton Kutcher movie. 

But let me tell you again, be kind. Not like excessively kind - flashing your eye lashes at everything, clapping your hands in glee and beaming with a smile, all in the name of fake enthusiasm. Good lord, no! I mean like the kind your grandmother probably taught you to be, when she read those bedtime stories to you. A noble king who cares for his kingdom and people, polite and sensitive to people's needs and appreciative of their hard work in general. Remember?

In an earlier blog, I happened to mention a short, witty anecdote from Colin Powell's life that showcases the importance of kindness in leadership. (Just in case, you think I am being funny, I am not. This is of primetime importance.)

Ok, so to really give you the lowdown behind this rant, it is this - I walked into the gym today and found people making a shit of the place. Weights thrown away on the floor like it was a playground, dirty towels and used paper cups in random spots, mats in semi-folded state, sweaty equipment after use and wait for it (and this is when the time bomb in me ticked) - a guy signals and yells to the gym operator - "Volume". He meant he wanted the audio system volume a notch up. 

Are you for real dude? I mean, I am ok with the lack of gym etiquette but the yelling and impoliteness fills me with rage. You actually had to instead say - "Can you please turn up the volume?"

Simple, right? But you chose to yell across the gym floor to a far off seated receptionist in an arrogant tone. For once, let me tell you she's an employee and she gets paid to do her job - not to serve your (arrogantly aired) grievances. She might as well have yelled back "Screw you", you know? Just saying.

And then of course there are people who will think to themselves - "The man is arrogant. He needs to learn a bit about manners. But that's probably none of my business."

Confession time - been there, seen that, done that. Not a very happy memory. But now, I don't do that anymore. It is as much my job to care as the day job I am paid to do. Actually it all circles back to you in the end. It's called karma. And karma is a bitch.

So next time, someone says or does something rude, please stop them and tell them that a little kindness goes a long way. Now since I just heard one of you say "Chill, take it easy", I will leave you with a really nice Harvard Business Review article aptly titled It is important to be kind than clever. No, they are not kidding when they dedicate an article on kindness. And yes, this article should be made mandatory reading at high school and upwards. Not just because it a business opportunity but it is the backbone of the human fabric. 

And I mean it when I say a lot of today's problems in society is because people have forgotten to be kind. Atleast, that's how it seems to be in my home country where we are excellent in churning out high skilled graduates but "forget" to teach them the core values. I mean of what use is cleverness if there is no kindness?

That brings me to another inspiring (and unconventional, because who speaks of kindness these days?) commencement speech by Jeff Bezos on the lessons of kindness. Ok now, that was enough reading/viewing material on kindness for the day. But I hopefully got the point across. Cross my heart and hope to die :-)

Moms are crazy

Tweet

Mothers are all slightly insane  - J. D. Salinger

After today I would never hire my mom to put my shoe laces together. Like never, ever. She just took the one end of it and pulled it all the way through all the lace holes. Like she was knitting from one end to another end. No criss-crossing, no symmetry of things, no nothing. That cost me a precious 15 mins of gym time.

I know what you are thinking right now. Before you get all sensitive about it, let me remind you how many corny jokes you crack on Rajinikanth. And still you love and respect him no? Admit it. Now it doesn't sound that much bad eh?

I still love my mom. But shoe laces...nothing doing.

Ok perhaps, that shoe lace fiasco was partly my fault. I happened to finish a half-marathon recently (bragging rights in your face!) and the last leg of 7 kms was in heavy rains. In the typical lazy fashion, I just set the shoes aside after the race and assumed it would all be ok. The next day, I wear the same pair to gym and the guy at the farthest corner of the gym gives me looks. Yes, they stinked like I left some dead rat in them. Once back home I casually mention how dirty they were and they have to be left up to dry and all.

Lo and behold, the next day, I have them all dry, shiny and smelling like perfumed. Also found two naphthalene balls in each of them. Moms and their infinite capacity for unconditional love never cease to surprise me. Soul-stirring stuff, if you ask me.

But then she had to do the shoe laces all wrong and "unimpress" me. Haha.

Like the day when she silently gulped down the last can of Red Bull in the fridge and spent the rest of the night watching countless hours of TV as a result. And left me seething - I was counting on the Red Bull to keep me awake to meet an important deadline. Of course, then we made truce and bonded over a cup of South Indian filter coffee. For the record, she assumed Red Bull was some kind of "cool drink" that tasted like Benadryl, but she was too thirsty and hot and didn't mind the pungent taste. Her verdict - "It was better than Pepsi." Ouch!

And then there are times when she throws curveballs at me, like these -

"I thought they would show a tiger in Ek Tha Tiger." (Touché, mom, Touché.)

"The banana stand guy has become friends with me. He gave me a dozen bananas for less today."

"I heard Priyanka Chopra is dating ShahRukh Khan now. But he is married no? What kandravi (word in Tamil that means ugly)"

"How to download Kolaveri Di song from WWW?" (She always refers to Internet as www - world wide web as if that is some championship like WWF)

"You mean they give free Marie biscuits at your office? Can you get one for me?" (Why do moms get excited about the small stuff? Why?)

"Neighbor aunty told me that her son bought a new car. I told them my daughter works in America." (Umm what?!)

"Why did you pay 750 rupees to run? What will happen if you run without paying? You are running on the road only no?" (When I told her about my half marathon)

"Kannu Paturdu (somebody cast an evil eye on you)" (When I fell sick one day and asked her if she had a fever tablet)

Moms are like that - crazy and lovely. Hence proved.

Home is where the heart is

Tweet

I step out of home early on Sunday mornings. Sunday is the time to buy vegetables from a nearby farmer's market. And at 6 am it seems rather early. But I have to make myself useful to mom. 

I somehow manage to get out of bed, slip into flip flops and reach the front porch. I dust my two-wheeler, roll a big jute bag and try the automatic ignition (that mostly fails. I was supposed to recharge the battery). 

As I drive I see a guy taking a leak on the street. He also manages to speak on his cell phone at the same time. What can I say - it is not a pretty sight. I need to keep an eye on the random buffaloes and stray dogs on the road. I stifle a yawn. 

It feels warm already although it is only few minutes past 6 am. I see paper boys hustling about on their bicycles. I see delivery guys carrying open cases of milk packets. I see the old folks walking, military like. I try to take a whiff of the air. It feels stuffy. I remember as a kid (during one of those hated early morning walks) the smell of fresh morning air. Unfortunately, that is a thing of the past. Now, the air is always thick, a combination of rising dust, pollution and gas. I park my vehicle at a "No Parking" zone. One of the rare times when you are sure there wont be towing activity of any kind. 

I am a noob at bargaining - I don't even try. I can already see vegetable vendors relishing the sight of me. A few extra rupees that I "giveaway" without putting up a fight. Later at home, I am (always) told - "Those 5 extra rupees could have gotten me half a bag of assorted leafy greens." And those 5 rupees over time would become big enough to buy a quarter kilogram of chicken meat. You know, the conversation amplifies like that in magnitude. I have learnt to just nod, accept my flaws and promise to try the next time.

I also have to go to a designated store to get some eggs. Apparently the eggs are the "biggest" here. Don't ask me why they would be "biggest" only there. That's what I am told to do. Never question the middle class counsel. They are almost always true.

The few trips I made to India from USA, I never stayed long enough to understand how much I had become sensitive to the environment in India. But now, after months of living in India, even after all the traffic and heat and dirt and open sewages and power cuts and a million other things that affect me on an everyday basis, this feels like home. 

Allow me to explain a bit later. But first some more insights (or rather jogging up memories of those who have already experienced the Indian lifestyle).

A service provider will never guarantee you his services even if you pay the dues and even if you pay him a tip. He will rather fix it for you if you abuse him, verbally. And after all that verbal exchange, if you offer him tea, he will happily sit and talk with you about local politics and how the petrol and food prices are affecting everyone. Yes, Indians are full of contradictions like that. 

A service technician will come (minimum of ) 4 hours later to the appointment time. And that after a swamping him with phone calls where he will tell you "baaju mein hoon madam" (I am almost there by the side of your home) and yet he has not even stepped out of wherever he exists. You rage, grumble and get angry and upset at his audacity to lie at your face, blatantly. And when he does show up, it's probably close to dinner time.

And where in the world would you find unified hatred against queue system. Jumping the lines is so common in India it exasperates me. No matter where you go, right from a 5 star restaurant to the local movie ticket counter, people always want to get ahead of you.

So does this still feel like home? Strangely, yes.

The first month I was upset. I was really really upset here. I couldn't get half my errands done here. I found everything ugly, disoriented and chaotic. My moods got so uncontrollable as if I was PMSing. I was constantly grumbling. I would look at the homeless people and children begging at the traffic lights, tugging at my jeans, prostrating at my feet - they would do anything to get a currency note from me. I would look around and find people going about their normal routine. 

Why aren't any one of us concerned? I would think to myself. Why are we so insensitive?

And yet I forget this is where I was born and brought up. That I lived in the exact same circumstances and I didn't feel necessarily this upset then. So why this change now in my belief system? And why now after months, I have become insensitive as well.

I have no clear answer to this. But what I believe happened is I made peace with a lot of things here. Indians have heard so many false promises before that they have sort of moulded themselves to fit in this confusing grid of Indian life. Those who are rich live a rich lifestyle, those who are middle class go as far as their reach can go, and those who are poor, well, they don't have the privilege of making a choice. 

The first thing I learnt after a confusing first month was to let go things that are not in my control and stop getting upset about random stuff. The second thing, if anything can be outsourced (i.e delegated), I do so immediately. There is always labor, ready to fix things for you, at a nominal price. Third, if I want to have fun, I really can have fun. It takes time and planning but it is possible.

And last, but the best part, you are in the proximity of your family and loved ones. There is nothing more calming and fulfilling than that in this world. 

I use my smartphone less, I spend more time with family, I hardly watch TV, I celebrate every Indian festival, I debate local politics and government policies. I feel special because I have a decent lifestyle, I have a congenial workplace, I have delicious food, I can read Indian magazines and newspapers, I can have pickles, papad and breakfast food anytime of the day, I can talk about all things Indian without trying hard to explain. Ridiculous but true. In a way, I feel humbled, privileged and accomplished. And it feels good. Because this is what feels like home, smells like home and looks like home from the time you were born and lived here.

Of course, it is not love all the time. There is nothing romantic about poverty, corruption, scandals and other prevailing issues in India. Yes, we have an overwhelming number of problems here - something I wouldn't have acknowledged years ago, when I hadn't stayed outside of India. I think living in USA for half a decade has given me a fresh set of eyes; to take a hard look at the problems here and really focus on where I can provide value.

This is home. This is where the heart is. And this is what will matter.

The myth of the independent woman

Tweet

One in two times, you must have heard that inner voice tell you -

"You are smart, fierce and working it. You are an independent woman."

That inner voice must have risen either due to modern pop culture (oh, we love our independent woman so much!) or you used to listen to Destiny's Child track a little too often in the 90's. Either way, let me tell you that is a myth.

What is an independent woman anyway? Girl in a suit and heels during the day, sexy and sassy in a pub by the night, super mom and wife at home, takes care of bills and knows how to "fit in" with the society. She never cries. She knows to cook, knit, clean, rear kids, maintain a home, organize parties just like that. She knows how to jump the hoops. She wiggles from one role to another with the extreme makeover of a reality show participant. Hail independent women - they do it all, have it all, flaunt it all.

Look at Katherine Heigl for instance in the movie Ugly Truth. She's an example of independent woman. Smart TV producer in tailored designer suits, living in a big suburban villa like home, control freak who loves keeping things clean and hunting for the sensitive and metrosexual Mr. Right with Jesus's abs. 

Congratulations, chick flicks have just spring-boarded the image of an independent woman to an all new level. They have set up, every one of the 20-something girls for failure. I mean who doesn't want to be like Katherine in Ugly Truth. She's hot, young, rich, powerful and will also get her perfect man in the end.

Only life is not a fairy tale like that. Life does not have a map with a fixed set of rules. We forget it is not an ideal perfect world out there.

Welcome to the real world where the image of an independent woman is a myth. 

No one can have it all, take it all and do it all. Even the most powerful and mean looking women in the world are vulnerable and possess weaknesses.

I have no problem with cultivating empowerment, self-confidence and equal rights in women. I have a problem with the unnecessary romanticism of the concept of "independent woman".

You know how much pressure that puts on a woman? As it is, she's dealing with making a living for herself (and others), supporting herself and her family and attempting to lead an everyday life with dignity. You want to tell her to dress a certain way, look a certain way, work a certain way so she can handle all kinds of jobs because you know, she must act like an independent woman, in the big bad world. That's not independent woman, that's an octopus (with eight hands to multitask)

Sorry, that aint gonna happen boss. She is going to be exactly like any other human on this earth. Happy, when she gets a pay raise. Sob, when she feels lonely. Lazy, when she feels like. Angry, when she's not treated with respect. Sloppy, when she wants to. Just like every other man.

Stop calling women resilient. What does that even mean btw? That she should stick up to any crap the world throws at here and still stand up smiling. That's not resilient that's losing one's self-dignity. That's being treated inferiorly. It is ok for her to breakdown. To seek help. To take someone's support. That doesn't make her weak or less independent. That makes her smart and playing her cards right.

You know what is independent? When she can do what she loves, when she can move with people she loves, when she can pick and choose her friends and activities, when she can genuinely express her feelings and doesn't have to worry about complying with your rules of a pseudo independent woman. 

A woman with passion is far more sexy than you think. The sooner you embrace that, the sooner you will win her heart.

So the next time you ask your wife, daughter, sister, female colleague to be independent, trust me, they would have felt far more happier if you didn't mention that word. Tell her instead what she means to you and why she is important to you. 

Or if you are at a loss for words, just repeat the line "You is smart, you is kind, you is important" from The Help. 

A little flattery always gets you a 10/10 with woman. But if you piss her off, she is going to make Minny's chocolate pie for you:

Girl, Interrupted

Tweet

Yes, I sort of liked that movie. But I am not going to talk about the movie here. However, you are free to draw parallels between the movie and the below post, as you please. You will see the connection (well, almost)

So here I am, all alone, solitary, single (well, not exactly, I am committed but not quite the official news). Now come the good parts about it. You are free to do what you like. You are free to while away your time. You are free to look silly, do silly, talk silly. You are free to lock yourself up and daydream and curse and get envious about everything and everyone. You can cry foul when things don't go your way - you know like, how I am a single girl, independent but still the society is callous to me, sort of thing)

Good parts end right there though.

In come the talking aunts, girlfriends, neighbors, acquaintances, storekeepers, janitors, gym trainers and so on and so forth (without any gender bias, please feel free to count men also). You get the drift. And they all freely talk about the single most hotly debated topic in the Indian milieu - My marriage.

I mean forget the slumping economy, the surging food prices, communal violence and disturbing scale of scandals in the country. Leave all that aside. Let's focus on the most important crisis - my marriage. 

Of course, they are all just concerned about me. #sarcasm

A typical conversation even with a close friend starts with a "How are you? Long time" and jumps abruptly to "Marriage ka kya hua?". It feels like a Himesh Reshammiya song ringing in your ears all the time. "Oooooooo....marriage...oooooo". (Yes, I know you know. Just wanted to sound dramatic)

Of course, my close friend is concerned. Lets say hypothetically I do marry, ok. Then what? Will it be "Babies ka kya hua?". This is like a never ending sequel. Remember that movie Lethal Weapon? I could never keep a count of the sequels of that movie and I just gave up one day. Same thing I will do here - give up and pay no attention to any sentences with keyword "marriage". Blanket rule.

Even if I go to grocery store, the guy who checks the bill on my way out looks at me weirdly. I secretly think even he is wondering about my marriage. The other day, the bank guy asks me the same. Asks me if I have a joint account with my husband. No, I do not have a husband FYI. But I can get me a fictional husband, if you like. Anyway, I don't believe in this joint account business (yeah, I am sort of like that. A girl with a strong set of beliefs. Ok, actually, it was because of my dad. He kept saying right from when I was 4 years old - never keep a joint account, b****** will take all your money and run off. Classic. He just drilled that thought into me, didn't even wait till my puberty. So the other day as I watched Satyamev Jayate episode on domestic violence, mom goes wide-eyed and tells - "See, dad was right". Mom and dad don't have a joint account btw. Nice trusting couple there.)

I have one doubt though. People are visibly upset when they know I am not married, and happen to know my age (which btw, I will not tell you because then you will ask me about marriage). Why are they upset? Shouldn't my parents or I be the one who should be upset?

Frankly if you ask me, it is easier to file taxes being single. I don't even know what's with that dependent healthcare and joint taxes bullshit. And I am not looking forward to figuring that out. As if I have less paperwork to do.

And after all this, I go home one day and I see mom I immediately blurt out "marriage". She honestly thought I said "drainage". (Mom has a hearing problem. Too many Sun TV serials have taken a toll on her. All that yelling and drama in those serials I tell you).

Although it would be weird if mom and I wanted to play a game like that - Chalo, lets play "marriage marriage" today.  Only barbie dolls in a dulhan's dress would be missing (btw do they make that? That will make an interesting gift to someone I know).

Yet another day, I was in my "Why God, why me only?" depression mode because of some unexpected happenings. At tough times like that, I open youtube.com and search for "feel good movies". (Btw, the search results for that phrase suck. And I always see two ads, no matter what the keyword search - Hangouts on YouTube and Dhanush is back with his new single. How are they relevant to my search I don't know. This is heights only :-/). Frustrated, I opened the hindi movie, Hum Aapke Hain Kaun. That movie has been my friend in the harshest of times. Only later, I realized that movie is all about marriage, baby cermonies and funeral. Irony. More depressed I got.

Thankfully, I found respite in an amusing climax scene in the movie Life in a Metro -
Konkana Sen runs to Irrfan Khan's marriage to confess that she is in love with him but the man interrupts and says "Lekin petticoat, blouse sab uske naap ka sil gaya hain. Itna late kyun bol rahi ho?” (But the wedding dress has been stitched to the bride's measurements. Why are you confessing so late?).

Even the latest library book I checked out, had an entire section dedicated to relationship and baby advice. I picked it up thinking it was a business book (They sold it as a book that applies business theories to life.  Also it had 5 star reviews on Amazon. Got pawned there. Honestly, who wouldn't be tempted to read a book whose title reads - How will you measure your life? Ok maybe not you.)

But seriously, a single Indian girl can take only so much. Enough is enough.

*Insert an imaginary picture of me standing in temple yelling at God angrily about the injustice*

Someone asked me this week about pros and cons of relocating to India after living in the US. Remind me to write this rant in my reply to that enquiry.

The power of purpose

Tweet

An intern asked me a question recently (rephrased here), over lunch - "I am so confused with my options. Which team do you think I must join?"

I silently chuckled at that question. I saw in her, myself, nearly a decade back, asking a similar question. And I wish I got the answer that I gave her - "It doesn't really matter". Of course, she didn't seem quite convinced by that answer. 

She eventually did, after I was able to spend a good 15 mins, telling what she should rather focus her energies and time on. Of course, like several of us, she will be influenced by her experiences, her peers and the people she meets and that will either steer towards or away from the advice I gave her.

And this is what I told her -

On an average, we all work towards excellence. Nobody aims for mediocrity. We want to know as we much as we can about all "good" things in the world and how to achieve them - job promotions, higher paychecks, high-flying lifestyles, fame, attention and recognition. What we don't understand is that most of them are really tangible, short-term benefits. In the long run, what matters is did you find that one thing you love and were you able to achieve it?

Briefly put - "Did you find your purpose in life?"

School and college are some of the best times to explore that question because you have all that time away from relationships, job stress, family obligations. For some, it is immediately clear.  For some others, it takes about few years. For the rest (a fairly large proportion of people), it takes an incredibly long time - during this process you have two choices:

- Give up and settle

- Don't settle and keep looking

The problem we face on an everyday basis is this - you are always working for immediate, short-term, tangible benefits. (And the question the intern posed falls in this bucket). How many times have we faced a choice between the short term and the long term? We almost always favor the former with a quick justification of "just this once". And before you realize, you have been doing this too many times (not just once).

The question(s) she must rather ask is/are - "How can I grow? Where are the learning opportunities and how can I seize them? What are some specific things I must try out? Is this what I like to do with my time? Is this what I love? Is this what I want to become?" Unfortunately, there are no clear answers to such questions. You learn, evolve and move on from one experience to another; checking each item on your infinite list of things to do towards finding your purpose. The lesson being, to try out as many things you can, to be open-minded, to stop judging, and to constantly question the purpose behind everything. 

This is the most important (and also the most difficult) thing you will ever learn - To keep your head above all trivialities in life and be focussed on finding, committing and achieving your purpose. Every time you face a choice, you ask yourself - "Is this inline with my purpose in life?"

Is everyday a Groudhog Day?

Tweet

"Happy Independence Day" is trending on Twitter. Happy Independence Day India!

However, nothing has changed. You find the same news about scams, crimes, exploitation, poverty and a million other negative things sprinkled with some Independence Day special programs on TV (like the Prime Minister's national address, parade and some patriotic songs). Tomorrow comes and we are back to the grind. Life goes on.

But I thought to myself - Lets be a little less cynical today, shall we?

So there I was standing in the shower. Another day, another epiphany. 

Remember the movie Groundhog Day? For those who haven't watched the movie (you must watch it btw), the lead protagonist Bill Murray relives a day over and over again. In the movie, that day happens to be what Americans celebrate as the Groundhog Day. Bill Murray realizes that he is not accountable for his actions since the day repeats all over again the next day. Since he wouldn't suffer the consequences of what he does, he goes about breaking the law, mistreats people, tries to seduce a woman by finding her interests and so on. After several days he realizes that he can actually use this opportunity in a good way compared to the manipulative way. He starts learning the names of people in his town, takes piano lessons and eventually wins his girl over because he has become a better man.

So why all this summary of a movie you ask?

I think the movie delivers a subtle message - 

Over the years, we have been experiencing some form of the Groundhog day. The headlines of the day may have been a little different, but the news stories are essentially the same - political turmoil, challenging economy, increased corruption, lack of governance, decelerating infrastructure, energy crisis and a plethora of such negative news. 

Most of us have become insensitive and apathetic to the situations and circumstances in India and have completely shut us off from the proceedings. This is a rather dangerous reaction from Indians. 

Things are not going to improve on their own. Like Bill Murray we have the opportunity to change our behaviors regardless of what is outside our control. We constantly complain and hope that someone else figures out a way to make India a better place. What we don't realize is little actions lead to a revolution of sorts. Yes, there is hope. Without hope there is nothing. We must hope for an India that we want her to be. And we must make those little changes in our behavior and actions and bring about positive changes in whatever we do (this can be as minimal as fulfilling the duties of your job). On a larger scale, this makes a massive difference. Don't listen to the naysayers. Haters will be haters.

Treat every day as an opportunity to give back, to make a positive dent in your community. This is the true essence of independence. Treat this as a gift, an opportunity within your reach.

Ask yourself - Are you using your freedom to do the right thing and make a positive change? Remember, it does not have to be a Groundhog day for you.