Mothers are all slightly insane - J. D. Salinger
After today I would never hire my mom to put my shoe laces together. Like never, ever. She just took the one end of it and pulled it all the way through all the lace holes. Like she was knitting from one end to another end. No criss-crossing, no symmetry of things, no nothing. That cost me a precious 15 mins of gym time.
I know what you are thinking right now. Before you get all sensitive about it, let me remind you how many corny jokes you crack on Rajinikanth. And still you love and respect him no? Admit it. Now it doesn't sound that much bad eh?
I still love my mom. But shoe laces...nothing doing.
Ok perhaps, that shoe lace fiasco was partly my fault. I happened to finish a half-marathon recently (bragging rights in your face!) and the last leg of 7 kms was in heavy rains. In the typical lazy fashion, I just set the shoes aside after the race and assumed it would all be ok. The next day, I wear the same pair to gym and the guy at the farthest corner of the gym gives me looks. Yes, they stinked like I left some dead rat in them. Once back home I casually mention how dirty they were and they have to be left up to dry and all.
Lo and behold, the next day, I have them all dry, shiny and smelling like perfumed. Also found two naphthalene balls in each of them. Moms and their infinite capacity for unconditional love never cease to surprise me. Soul-stirring stuff, if you ask me.
But then she had to do the shoe laces all wrong and "unimpress" me. Haha.
Like the day when she silently gulped down the last can of Red Bull in the fridge and spent the rest of the night watching countless hours of TV as a result. And left me seething - I was counting on the Red Bull to keep me awake to meet an important deadline. Of course, then we made truce and bonded over a cup of South Indian filter coffee. For the record, she assumed Red Bull was some kind of "cool drink" that tasted like Benadryl, but she was too thirsty and hot and didn't mind the pungent taste. Her verdict - "It was better than Pepsi." Ouch!
And then there are times when she throws curveballs at me, like these -
"I thought they would show a tiger in Ek Tha Tiger." (Touché, mom, Touché.)
"The banana stand guy has become friends with me. He gave me a dozen bananas for less today."
"I heard Priyanka Chopra is dating ShahRukh Khan now. But he is married no? What kandravi (word in Tamil that means ugly)"
"How to download Kolaveri Di song from WWW?" (She always refers to Internet as www - world wide web as if that is some championship like WWF)
"You mean they give free Marie biscuits at your office? Can you get one for me?" (Why do moms get excited about the small stuff? Why?)
"Neighbor aunty told me that her son bought a new car. I told them my daughter works in America." (Umm what?!)
"Why did you pay 750 rupees to run? What will happen if you run without paying? You are running on the road only no?" (When I told her about my half marathon)
"Kannu Paturdu (somebody cast an evil eye on you)" (When I fell sick one day and asked her if she had a fever tablet)
"The banana stand guy has become friends with me. He gave me a dozen bananas for less today."
"I heard Priyanka Chopra is dating ShahRukh Khan now. But he is married no? What kandravi (word in Tamil that means ugly)"
"How to download Kolaveri Di song from WWW?" (She always refers to Internet as www - world wide web as if that is some championship like WWF)
"You mean they give free Marie biscuits at your office? Can you get one for me?" (Why do moms get excited about the small stuff? Why?)
"Neighbor aunty told me that her son bought a new car. I told them my daughter works in America." (Umm what?!)
"Why did you pay 750 rupees to run? What will happen if you run without paying? You are running on the road only no?" (When I told her about my half marathon)
"Kannu Paturdu (somebody cast an evil eye on you)" (When I fell sick one day and asked her if she had a fever tablet)
Moms are like that - crazy and lovely. Hence proved.
2 comments:
hehe :D yeah!!!!
:)
Post a Comment