This Incredible Life

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"We act as though comfort and luxury were the chief requirements of life, when all that we need to make us happy is something to be enthusiastic about." - Einstein


And that is all there is to lead an incredible life - enthusiasm, lots of it.


A co-worker of mine shared this (awesome) article (pasted from her email to me) during a particularly difficult week for me. I happened to read the article 4 times so far and each time it made me smile - the smile of gratitude. We often forget how much we have going for us, in life. How phenomenal things are around us. How awesome people are.

It also eerily reminds me of this video on Double Rainbow spotting at Yosemite (see below) which I had immediately dismissed in my usual cynical way as "over the top reaction from a guy who is high". Now that I think of it, I don't care if he was high. If I am half as enthusiastic as this guy I won't need anything else to keep me happier than I am now.

Anyhow, back to the article. It is worth the 5 mins you will invest today. So read on...

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In Praise of Honest Enthusiasm for the Awesomeness of Life


One Saturday morning last October, my friend Greg and I were running down the North Kaibab Trail in the Grand Canyon, close to halfway through 26 miles of trail. 

We had run four miles and would run about four more to Phantom Ranch, where we could double-fist coffee and Lemmy lemonade at the cantina before climbing 4,400 vertical feet back up the South Rim to finish a hike/run Rim-to-Rim.

I turned around mid-stride and said,

“Hey Greg!”

“Yeah,” he said.

“We’re running in the Grand Canyon!”

Sometimes I get to do awesome things, and I kind of forget how awesome they are. Do you? I get stressed, caught up in other stuff, and I forget how fortunate I am, how incredible life has turned out to be most days, and some of the special places I’ve gotten to see. Most of the time, though, I try to keep a pretty good handle on it — try to remember to turn around and yell to my friend that yes, we are running across the most famous hole on Earth, and that’s pretty special. Or, you know, even reminding someone a few months later about something special.

Kurt Vonnegut, in a 2003 speech to students at the University of Wisconsin, said,

“I urge you to please notice when you are happy, and exclaim or murmur or think at some point, ‘If this isn’t nice, I don’t know what is.’”

In 2012, I urge you to notice when something is awesome, as it often is, and exclaim or murmur or just make a mental note of it. Isn’t it just goddamn fantastic that you have your health, for example? Or running water, or electricity? Or that you have enough money to actually pay someone else to make you a cup of coffee? Or if you want ice cream, you are at any time in America probably only 5 or 10 minutes away from a place that sells some form of it? (Trust me on that one)

Your life, even the bad parts, is fucking amazing. And most of the small things that make up your life are amazing, too — mountain bike rides, rock climbs, ski runs, sunsets, stars, friends, people, girlfriends and boyfriends, dogs, songs, movies, jokes, smiles…hell, even that burrito you ate for lunch today was pretty phenomenal, wasn’t it?

What was your enthusiasm for these things last year? I recommend you step it up in 2012.

People can disagree with things like quality, maybe your taste in food, or whether or not a movie is good. But no one can argue with enthusiasm, especially when it is over the top.

Do you think that climb you just did is the greatest climb ever? Great! If someone tries to tell you it isn’t, who cares? “Greatest Rock Climb Ever” is not an objective title. Thusly, when you are excited about a climb (or a trail run or a summit view or a bike ride or a sunrise), don’t let anyone bring you down.

A conversation where someone puts down your favorite ski area/mountain/rock climb/trail/burrito is not a conversation about ski areas/mountains/rock climbs/trails/burritos. It is a conversation about that person being a pompous asshole. Go forth and be positive in 2012.

Enthusiasm doesn’t have to stand up to criticism. It doesn’t even have to really make sense. If you finish a ski run, MTB trail or sport climbing route, and you like love it, I encourage you to try out new superlatives when describing it to someone else. This goes for everything you’re excited about. Examples:

“I’m just going to tell you now that Outer Space is the most incredible rock climb you will ever do. You cannot not smile while climbing it. It’s like the Beatles. Even if you for some ridiculous reason don’t enjoy it, you can’t deny its inherent goodness.”

“Have you heard the new Macklemore song? It will knock you on your ass!”

“The Eggplant Parmesan sub at Pasquini’s is probably my favorite sandwich in the entire city of Denver, if not the state of Colorado. In fact, now that I’ve said that, I think we should go to Pasquini’s immediately.”

Maybe some of the stuff you like love, that you’re passionate about, isn’t cool. Hey, this is 2012. Everything is cool. Irony is either everything, or dead. Be honest: When you see someone wearing a Motley Crue t-shirt, you don’t know if they’re serious, or wearing it to be ironic, do you? Do you like Motley Crue? Then ROCK THAT SHIT. And spread happiness.

Remember it is not illegal to high-five anyone. Do you use exclamation points in the salutations of your e-mails? Well, why not?

Do you like to laugh? Most people do, don’t they? Including baristas, waitstaff, and retail personnel. Perhaps you have at some point had a real conversation with one of these people. This can sometimes begin by sincerely asking those people how they are, instead of treating them like a machine that makes you coffee or orders your salad. This opens the door to making them laugh. If you play your cards right, you may be able to high-five them at the end of a conversation.

Remember yesterday, when you saw that one thing that reminded you of that one friend of yours, and you thought about how if you sent that friend a photo of the thing that reminded you of them, they would smile? But then you didn’t send your friend that photo, and it wasn’t awesome. Don’t do that again. Here’s what you do:

Take the photo.

Send it to your friend.

Your friend smiles. The world is a better place. Thanks.

The Hacker Way

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No, that is not an address in the Bay Area. On second thoughts, it could be (too lazy to look up)

Amidst all the furore this week revolving around the Op-ed in New York Times questioning a company's moral standards, I sat wondering about what got us all here. What is that one thing we are forgetting about? What is important and means the most to you, me and everyone around us? And then while standing under the shower (yeah, I had a moment) it came out loud to me - Hacking.

Hacking is important.

Hacking is a way of life. It needn't just be computer code. It can be anything you build, you own, put it out there and relentlessly improve it over time. That solves someone's problem and makes lives easier. The best music you can make, the best books you can write, the best dances you can choreograph, the best lifestyle you can have, the best dishes you can cook....anything and everything you are passionate about can be "hacked". Notice how the word "hacking" is used in the positive sense :-) In a hacker's world, perfect is frowned upon and executing and shipping is welcomed. 

Last week, I was reading the Facebook S-1 from their IPO filing (yes, it took me this long) and loved how they summed up "hacking" in a page. Their mantra is "Done is better than perfect" -- I couldn't agree more.

And so like always got to share it here :-) This is an excerpt from their S-1 filing that describes the hacker culture:

"As part of building a strong company, we work hard at making Facebook the best place for great people to have a big impact on the world and learn from other great people. We have cultivated a unique culture and management approach that we call the Hacker Way.

The word "hacker" has an unfairly negative connotation from being portrayed in the media as people who break into computers. In reality, hacking just means building quickly or testing the boundaries of what can be done. Like most things, it can be used for good or bad, but the vast majority of hackers I've met tend to be idealistic people who want to have a positive impact on the world.

The Hacker Way is an approach to building that involves continuous improvement and iteration. Hackers believe that something can always be better, and that nothing is ever complete. They just have to go fix it - often in the face of people who say it's impossible or are content with status quo. 

Hackers try to build the best services over the long term by quickly releasing and learning from smaller iterations rather than trying to get everything right all at once. To support this, we built a testing framework that at any given time can try thousands of versions of Facebook. We have the words "Done is better than perfect" painted on our walls to remind ourselves to always keep shipping.

Hacking is also inherently hands-on active discipline. Instead of debating for days whether a new idea is possible or what the best way to build something is, hackers would rather just prototype something and see what works. There's a hacker mantra that you'll hear a lot around Facebook offices: "Code wins arguments"

Hacker culture is also extremely open and meritocratic. Hackers believe that the best idea and implementation should always win - not the the person who is best at lobbying for an idea or the person who manages the most people."

PS: Their current YoY growth is at 88% while they are targeting a valuation of $100B, which sounds way too ambitious compared to their growth. But then they are hackers and anything is possible in a hacker's world :-)

The Steve Jobs School of Leadership

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Ever since I have finished reading the book Steve Jobs by Walter Isaacson, I failed to understand what made Steve Jobs such a great leader. In fact, he was the smack opposite of what a leader is defined to be in traditional terms.

Then all of a sudden Jobs came by and started a whole new facet of leadership. Suddenly, being an asshole was a cool thing. This idea was so conflicting to my mind that has been taught that leadership is all about being generous, inspiring, considerate, supportive and appreciative.

So imagine my surprise bumping into this article in Harvard Business Review about what made Steve Jobs style of leadership palpable. It sort of made sense to me having read through this article...

Why would you listen to someone who was a jerk?

- Because they had built a wealth of credibility about them and their decisions. Who would you listen to if you wanted know about the future of technology? Steve Jobs or your mom?

- Because they were sort of like, say, those personal trainers at gyms. Yes, you hate them for pushing you through pain, but you know you are going to get great benefits out of this misery.

- Because they had a sense of higher purpose in life. How many leaders have you met, who knew what their purpose was in life? Wouldn't that be the most inspiring moment/revelation for you?

Having said that, I don't mean to propose you should start being a jerk to people. Please, no :-)

This is what I really think - Steve Jobs was paranoid. He was paranoid about things that mattered to him. I think everything else just followed due to the nature of the three qualities he exhibited. I am not sure if there is a right or wrong way to lead people. Apparently, this worked for him.

And really, end of the day, you want to see yourself happy more than anything (That's probably what Jobs did too) If you don't agree to that, you are lying :-)

Burying the lead

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Burying the lead often occurs in journalism. This is a problem of how journalists stray away from reporting the most important point of a story. However this is a phenomenon that occurs in our everyday non-journalist lives as well. We often miss the core of an idea, message, work etc. that we are involved in.

I found the following book excerpt from Made to Stick (a book everyone must read) to be a profound illustration of this concept, that it instantly stuck with me. I am tempted to share it here:

Nora Ephron is a screenwriter whose scripts for Silkwood, When Harry Met Sally and Sleepless in Seattle have all been nominated for Academy Awards. Ephron started her career as a journalist for the New York Post and Esquire. She became a journalist because of her high school journalism teacher.

Ephron still remembers the first day of her journalism class. Although the students had no journalism experience, they walked into their first class with a sense of what a journalist does: A journalist gets the facts and reports them. To get the facts, you track down the five Ws - who, what, where, when, and why.

As students sat in front of their manual typewriters, Ephron's teacher announced the first assignment. They would write the lead of a newspaper story. The teacher reeled off the facts:

"Kenneth L. Peters, the principal of Beverly Hills High School, announced today that the entire high school faculty will travel to Sacremento next Thursday for a colloquium in new teaching methods. Among the speakers will be anthropologist Margaret Mead, college president Dr. Robert Maynard Hutchins, and California governor Edmund 'Pat' Brown."

The budding journalists sat at their typewriters and pecked away at the first lead of their careers. According to Ephron, she and most of the other students produced leads that reordered the facts and condensed them into a single sentence:

"Governor Pat Brown, Margeret Mead, and Robert Maynard Hutchins will address the Beverly Hills High School faculty Thursday in Sacramento...."

The teacher collected the leads and scanned them rapidly. Then he laid them aside and paused for a moment.

Finally he said, "The lead of the story is 'There will be no school next Thursday.'"

"It was breathtaking moment", Ephron recalls. "In that instant I realized that journalism was not just about regurgitating the facts but about figuring out the point. It wasn't enough about to know the who, what, when, and where; you had to understand what it meant. And why it mattered."

SF half marathon 2012 - Notes from Week 3

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Hi ya all!

How is life?

I got my first blisters (from running) today :-)

Ok, aside from that cheerfulness, I will be honest. I wanted to completely dodge this post today.

This week I have hardly run or worked out. I know. What a sham! And it is only third week. Tch Tch.

Well I missed a run and a workout. Just like the last week. Sigh.

And the one easy run I did, lets just say I dragged myself to finish a paltry 3 miles.

So really I was looking forward to my mileage run today. Also because I ordered this shiny new wireless headset (oh the hopes I pinned on it!) and a nice armband to keep my iPhone tucked in safely. Unfortunately (yes, you guessed my tone here already), the headset had ear buds that would fall off my ears. This was the last straw. This seals it. Ear buds don't work with my ears. Period.

Well, at least the arm band was working fine. So according to my training plan I was supposed to do a 5.5 miler today, but I had this nagging feeling and this whole week was a downer for me - sick, red eyes, irregular sleep, toe joint pain from last run, cramps. Phew!

I really really really wanted to break out of this funk. Like, really really!

I set myself an ambitious 6 miles. Of course, I kept a lookout if my body was wearing out...it's always important not to overdo it and listen to your body signals.

As usual the first 2 miles are always tough for me. It is almost at end of 3rd mile that I get a runner's high. My pace picks up and I feel like "Hey this is not so bad. I think I can do another 3-4 miles."

I also made sure I was breathing well and running in form. (No more toe sprains please!)

At the end of 6.1 miles in ~58 mins, I felt SO magnificent. You will know when you do it too.

And now I have nothing but tremendous respect for runners. It is mind over matter people!

Just do it. Make it count (shameless plug for Nike;-)

PS: I promised I would reward myself with some new dry-fit gear after my 6 miler under an hour. I think I justify running gear now. I still need to up my drinking water and protein intake though. So those will be my goals for this week. Happy Sunday folks!

Steal like an Artist

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We have all heard about that one before :-)

This happens to be the title of a new book I am going to pick up for some quick reading this week. It is by a guy called Austin Kleon, who lives in Austin (duh!) and whose bio reads "I'm a writer who draws". Yes, he got me at his bio. His earlier projects included The Newspaper Blackout - how he used a sharpie to blackout words and create poetry out of newspaper text :-)

This is one of the talks he gave at The Economist where he speaks of how artists steal (the right way of course).

"We can pick our teachers and we can pick our friends and we can pick the books we read and the music we listen to and the movies we see, etcetera. You are a mashup of what you let into your life."

And an awesome poster from his book that caught my attention.

So what are you going to steal today?

Courtesy: brainpickings.org

Awesome Indian things # 6 : The 1 Rupee Popsicle called Pepsi

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Image courtesy: Google image search

Remember those plastic tube shaped popsicles they sold outside the schools? 50 paise a piece and 1 rupee for the longer one that was cut into halves? We fondly called them "Pepsi". Although I wonder, why they were called Pepsi in the first place!

I somehow had very little fetish for the ice colored popsicles. But I couldn't resist the flavored milk ones! Those were my favorites. I remember boys in my class tearing off the the ends of the plastic and using it to spray the water over each other at recess. Haha. It was ridiculous fun!

At my school we were divided into "sections". There was always a constant tussle between Section A (where I belonged) and Section B boys. Often over someone sprinkling colored water off these tubes on a random girl's skirt ;-)

After savoring the popsicles the boys would promptly roll it and inflate them with air only to make loud noises off them while deflating them. Oh the sort of stuff that made us instantly happy (only to be ruined by this Facebook-ridden online world)

On one of holidays to India, I was uber surprised to see a dedicated "Ice gola" shop setup a block from my home. And I was more surprised to see my dad taking a dig at it. From when did he start loving this stuff? When I was a kid I was strictly warned to keep off them due to health hazards (bad water = jaundice, the Indian parents preached then.) It also reminds me how this picture (below) got viral where it was cleverly named "Gogola" in google colors. Ha! Legendary stuff.

Someone build a time traveling machine. Please.

Image courtesy: Google image search

SF half marathon 2012 - Notes from Week 2

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Hey ya guys! How are you all doing this weekend?

I looked forward to much needed rest. Although I did catch a bit of it, I still feel like I could use one more day;) This week was tough. Not because I had to up my running. Because it was such a tough week at work. Every day was exhausting, leaving me with no mental energy to go for a dash. I missed a workout plus a run day. Sigh. Wish there were ways to gain a day, but alas no! A run missed is a run missed. Period. Also, I am just waiting for this winter to end so days can run longer and I don't have to worry about getting a run done by 5:30 pm when it starts getting dark.  Running in the mornings would be perfect if not for cold winds. So yeah, I think in a week or two I won't have any excuse to give, weather-wise:)

My mileage run this week was 5 miles (I felt like I could run more, but I have to contain and keep it steady, not rush into longer runs.) However on mile 5 an odd thing happened, I felt a sudden surge of pain in my big toe joint. I just brushed it aside as a normal sore. But I was disappointed that it brought down my pace dramatically. Last week I was able to wrap up 4.5 miles in 42 mins. However 5 miles this week led me to ~50 mins. Not good. But I think I will go easy on myself. Maybe this sore of a thing on my toe got me slow.

There was extreme redness like a rash on it yesterday. Today, the redness gone, I felt a little relieved. However it pains when I squeeze the skin on it. Hmm. Might as well go get it checked.

Well things on my list this week - Drink more water and increase my protein intake. Also will try to incorporate some new routines for my cross training. Really bored of elliptical now..

The SF half is weeks and weeks away. But time flies. So I am not going to get all complacent about the long gap :-)

Happy Sunday, all!

Why simple is the new fancy - What we can learn from Apple

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Everyday I come across so many people with great ideas. But when ideas transform into living and breathing solutions, they become something else. They do not solve the problem they were supposed to solve in the first place. The solution is no doubt fancy. It is also very complex. It also tries to solve "other" problems.

Do we care about "fancy"? No.

Do we care about complexity? Heck no.

Do we care about those "other" problems? Maybe. But I am happy if it solves the problem it was supposed to solve.

So why is it that when an idea transforms into a solution, all the above noise takes precedence over simplicity and ease of use?

Take the case of iPhone. If someone asked you why Apple iPhone is so hugely popular with the masses, what would be your answer?

My answer is simply - "What you see is what you get"

It is an unbelievably simple answer. An iPhone's popularity lies in its inherent ability to abstract away the complexity from the end user. As an end user I don't care if you used the most complex software stack or used an extremely powerful microprocessor chip. All I see is a phone that works for my main functions - making calls, receiving calls, managing contacts, browsing the Internet, streaming and downloading videos/photos/music, chatting and playing games.

So why is it important that you use an iPhone over other phones (aka why do you become that obsessed Apple iPhone fanboy?). Because Apple connects "emotionally" with people. And simplicity paves that way to emotional connection.

- Because things work at the touch/swipe of your finger (A seamless and smooth user experience with touch gestures. Seems like magic to me). That's how humans function..they use their hands and their sense of touch. And an iPhone picks on that.

- Because it is addictive. The app store is one of the biggest innovations of Apple. It is the platform, stupid! It is all about building a platform and exposing its API to developers who will build tools over it to extend its richness. Apple does nothing but cherry pick some of those apps for you. And the results are amazing for you to see, use and reuse and reuse...till you get to the point of addiction.

- Because lesser choices is a good thing. iPhone's minimalist physical interface works like a charm. It's a human psychology that given too many choices, humans are paralyzed and choose nothing. Given lesser choices, you are bound to be happier and make a choice.

- Because it is a thing of beauty. Period. And who doesn't like a thing of beauty? When you hold an iPhone in your hand, the first thing you look at is the pristine white color or the clean looking homepage. Do you know what effect it has on your human mind? (Not kidding here.) Human minds hate clutter. They despise harsh colors..

Steve Jobs wasn't an idiot when he talked about broadening one's understanding of human experiences to construct better designs. He didn't think he was merely building a fancy phone. He thought of it as the world's first "simplest" smartphone (ironical how simple and smart goes in the same line:) Which goes to say that simple things can be smart.)

So next time someone asks you to build something, think about it passionately. Try to solve the problem in the simplest possible human way.

SF half marathon 2012 - Notes from Week 1

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Yes, I finally gave in. Gave in to the idea of "how it would feel to finish a half marathon under 2 hrs 15 mins." Now that's a goal. Also on the way, I would like to shop for some "discipline" and "strong work ethic". The key to finishing a marathon (or half marathon) is not just hard work (of course you need to run!) but a whole bunch of discipline.

I am only in my second week of training (I am self training btw, which needs even more motivation and discipline). I can tell you the first week was hard. Hard, not because I had to run (thankfully I love running), but I had to keep it "consistent". Run, cross-train, run, cross-train...and so on. The entire week. It surprises me how the mind rebels against discipline. It is not tough, once you put your shoes on, music on and you are out the door. It is tough, to break that inertia till you get to the door. The rest of the magic just follows :-)

California is beautiful. If you are a Californian and you are not running, shame on you (with the exception of injuries). What better ways to explore the bay area than on foot. I loathe driving. I hate getting into a car to go to some place. How about some self-powered commuting for a change? Running, biking, skateboarding..anyone? You not only run on natural fuel (your body energy) and get lean, but also save so much fuel. Aren't you feeling charitable already? :-)

I know it is hard in the other states, due to constant changing weather. But summer should be a treat and what better ways to enjoy that than running? Ironically, I found more people in New York City enthusiastic and ready to kick butt than here when it came to running. I mean really, people running in subzero temperatures in their cold gear shows grit. Compare that to a lazy Californian. You have weather, beautiful terrain and trails going your way and yet you make excuses to budge? Tch tch.

The first week went quite good. I clocked in ~15 miles. Ok fine, my Nike+ says its 14.68 miles, for crying out loud.

Second week has already started and yesterday was my cross training day. I did some good, old fashioned elliptical workout for 40 mins. Felt good stretching the other muscles.

Today is the run day. And no matter what, I will just do it! :-)

Awesome Indian things # 5 : Autograph book

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In the 90's, high schools in India never had any 'graduation' ceremonies. Well, we did, sort of. Only we called them 'farewells'. And we didn't have yearbooks.

And so, one exciting thing about the days leading to the farewell was something we humbly called "Autograph book" (although I can't claim this to be an Indian thing, it surely was one of the highlights of high school farewells in India.) 

This springs back memories of every kind. What made this entire affair so exciting was - "What is that special guy/girl going to write about you?". As was the concept, we maintained a different autograph book for the faculty - the most boring, plain looking and serious autograph book would be promptly picked from Hallmark. The jazzy and style statement autograph book was bought to pass around friends.

And thereby the least controversial and at the same time, most cliched line of the millennium was born.

"Be yourself" - this line was scrolled all over each other's autograph book. Till this date, I believe that 90% of us who scrolled that line, didn't really mean it because we didn't really understand it (we didn't care. If we had to write a line for someone we didn't particularly care about, we would scribble "Be Yourself". Whatever that was supposed to mean, huh?

Some of them were outright shabby. They would write a word and then scratch it to death (so I couldn't read what was written! Mystery eh?). This pissed me off because here was a beautiful and colorful looking book and some was shitting all over it.

Some of them thought took pride in leaving a few pages and then writing somewhere in middle of the book. Seriously? You think I am going to search all over the book just to see where you might have written your precious pearls of wisdom and sweet nothings for me? Get a life dude.

And from the person who meant the most to you (i.e. in your fantasy world. why else would you be excited about a damn rambling on a book?), there would be cryptic statements. Something of the sort - "You are special". And you could run your imaginations wild with it. (Remember, you and him/her are in a fantasy world? Anything is possible here. No boundaries on imagination.) And then we could dish out our own interpretation with our friends. "He wrote to me! He wrote he loves me! He said I was beautiful and he is smitten by me" (See how the statement was interpreted. No mention of the "you are special" part. It morphs into beautiful, sexy, attractive, gorgeous, I love you)

Of course, there also had to be an equally unexciting dreary world of teachers' autograph book. Full of life lessons (which they never taught in class but rushed to write in my autograph book instead) - "You must persevere", "Achieve great heights and work hard", "Make your parents and teachers proud"

See where that was going? And as if this wasn't enough I had lots of God's messages scrolled over my book (I studied in a convent). 

"God will show you the path." "God bless you and your life." "God will guide you to your goal."

Sigh. The point being, too much of that stuff just had an opposite effect on us. Heck, no one really even bothered reading through the book (unless one of us had a crush on the teacher, which I unfortunately never experienced. Never mind that.)

I wish I had a favorite in them (at least I don't remember. It was decades ago!). I wish I could actually run into one of those things and see what sort of nonsensical stuff my school friends had written then. It would be amazing to scan them and put them up on this blog. Like anonymous autographs from the 90's ha!

Where did all that naive love go to? Bring back the autograph books!

I am in mood for a meme # 2 : Ra.One

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I am in mood for a meme # 1 : DSLR Camera

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The Curse of Knowledge

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Yes, sometimes I get deeply thoughtful about stuff like that. Not kidding.

So currently I am reading Made to Stick and this is an excerpt from the brilliant book on the curse of knowledge (it is easy to follow, I promise;-) And also since I am in the mood to throw this stuff at you, you got no choice.):

In 1990, Elizabeth Newton earned a PhD in psychology at Stanford by studying a simple game in which she assigned people to one of two roles: "tappers" or "listeners". Tappers received a list of 25 well-known songs such as "Happy Birthday to You" and "The Star Spangled Banner." Each tapper was asked to pick a song and tap out the rhythm to a listener (by knocking on a table). The listener's job was to guess the song, based on the rhythm being tapped. (By the way, this experiment is fun to try at home if there's a good "listener" candidate nearby)

The listener's job in this game is quite difficult. Over the course of Newton's experiment, 120 songs were tapped out. Listeners guessed only 2.5% of the songs: 3 out of 120.

But here's what made the result worthy of a dissertation in psychology. Before the listeners guessed the name of the song, Newton asked the tappers to predict the odds that the listeners would guess correctly. They predicted that the odds were 50%.

The tappers got their message across 1 time in 40, but they thought they were getting their message across 1 time in 2. Why?

When a tapper taps, she is hearing the song in her head. Go ahead and try it yourself - tap out "The Star Spangled Banner". It's impossible to avoid hearing the tune in your head. Meanwhile, the listeners can't hear the tune - all they can hear is a bunch of disconnected taps, like a kind of bizarre Morse Code.

In the experiment, tappers are flabbergasted at how hard the listeners seem to be working to pick up the tune. Isn't the song obvious? The tappers' expressions, when a listener guesses "Happy Birthday to You" for "The Star Spangled Banner," are priceless. How could you be so stupid?

It's hard to be a tapper. The problem is that tappers have been given knowledge (the song title) that makes it impossible for them to imagine what it's like to lack that knowledge. When they're tapping they can't imagine what it's like for the listeners to hear isolated taps rather than a song.

This is the Curse of Knowledge. Once we know something, we find it hard to imagine what it is like not to know it.

Book review: Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me (and other concerns)

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First, lookup Mindy Kaling. If you have identified her from The Office, good job. I just feel she should come on screen more often. Of course, I am also happy if she just keeps writing books like this one - Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me (and other concerns). If you want a flavor of this book, read this New Yorker piece she wrote - a funny take on the state of chick flicks. Not surprisingly, it also happens to be one of the chapters in the book :-)

                                   

It takes a certain kind to write this book - unabashedly funny, over-the-top sarcasm and loving to degrade oneself for the sake of laughs. All traits of a good comedian. Now, intertwine that with sassy humor and real-life events, with some girly fun thrown in here and there. That takes it up a few notches. Mindy Kaling (aka Vera Mindy Chokalingam) has arrived.

Comparisons with Tina Fey's Bossy Pants are inevitable, but having read both I am happy to say that the comparison ends there. The book stands on its own. She comes across as this cute, funny best friend that girls want to have. There is nothing more successful than a book that connects with a certain type of audience. I am sure the guys would love this book too. It is more about comedy than say a girl's fashion black book. But a girl, she will love it. So if you are guy who has a funny girlfriend, this is the book she will enjoy reading and love you even more for gifting it to her ;-)

Some of the chapters were laugh out loud. For instance there is one entire chapter on her long and vivid revenge fantasies that she imagines during workouts. Easily one of my favorite chapters.

Like I said, it takes a certain kind.

Awesome Indian things # 4 : Power Outage

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For the more unfortunate friends of mine (I mean the Westerners) who missed the rare opportunity to partake an event such as a "regular" power outage will never get themselves to understand the freedom and joy a power outage presents. Allow me to explain.

Also, I could write about power theft - another topic, another day. Pic courtesy: The Daily Reporter

In the 90's and also late 80's when shining stars (such as me and also a certain guy named Steve Jobs) thrived, power outages were a part and parcel (I love how I switch to British English) of life. Of course, as a kid, I had not many TV show options. So when that most favorite TV show (which also happens to be the only show that airs Bollywood songs) - Chitrahaar - was supposed to air and the power outage happened imagine my sorry state. In fact, I would spend the whole day terrorized thinking about what I would do, if the power went out on me during showtime. I sometimes resorted to praying and becoming intensely devout just so that God could allow the power to stay until the end of the show.

So but for this one situation, power outages were always welcomed by me. Since,

1) I didn't have to do my homework. I always had words of wisdom up my sleeve - "There is no light to study. Candle light is not good for the eyes." Parents would just give up at this point.

2) I could play "antakshari" without interruptions.  There is never a dearth of Bollywood songs. Ever.

3) Antakshari not only meant honing my singing skills, but also practicing verbal and physical fights with siblings, cousins, neighbor kids, street kids...all the young victims of power outage unite at such a fateful time.

4) I could go up the terrace and stare at the stars and the moon and think I will be some sort of a big deal sometime in future (also called as dreaming) while battling mosquitoes into the night.

5) I could eavesdrop at what the adults and senior citizens are bitching about. Oh they must really hate that old fat lady around the block...point noted.

6) I could play hide and seek, lock and key, chor police in the moonlight.

7) I could gossip about which guy is "sighting" which girl at school and whose love letter I messengered this week. I could also talk more important things like which Bollywood star is dating which other Bollywood star.

So there you go, you inferior people in the power-always world - You will never know the power of a power outage. Or you could just move into my hometown.

Valentine's Special - Fighting like nobody's business

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Yes. It is a fight club -  two's a duel. A verbal duel that begins with me, peaks with me and ends with him. Didn't I tell you about a little yin and yang the last time? Yes, so I fight and he listens. Yin and yang, there  you have it.

I have been guilty of pulling him to a combat, most of the times because I am too bored of stuff (sorry, it is just that way with me. My thought process sometimes includes - "I am bored this evening, so let me provoke the boyfriend and polish some of my profanity hurling skills").

I have known to be a little on the tom-boyish side of life. I don't groom myself. I don't like to giggle that much. I don't think unkempt hair and nails is the end of the world. I don't want to watch those sappy sentimental movies. I swear more than the average girl does. I have an intense urge to jump off a trapeze or a moving plane. I like to lounge around in my pajamas, outside. I think Brad Pitt, Ashton Kutcher, Bradley Cooper and all those blue eyed men don't deserve any attention. I don't like chocolates, cakes, flowers, stuffed toys..almost anything sweet and cute to look at. I like my gifts to have a lifetime utility value. I could go on forever....

But what has that to do with fights I have with boyfriend? Nothing. I was just in a mood to distract you all. However, I turn into this egoistical bitch, stubborn and dreadfully moody at times - something that the boyfriend has carefully studied for years and has trained himself on how to detonate that type of behavior.

It is weird how a relationship survives amidst silly fights. If that soap opera told you that fights only show how much you love each other, I will say yes to it and also add that it shows your destructive side too. There is an old adage - "Think before you leap" and I am not glad to say I don't go by it.

There is a natural destructive tendency in girls and no matter how much effort I put in to revitalize my tom-boyish side of personality, this is one trait I will never be able to give up - that natural destructive tendency to "fight" - exists in all girls. No exceptions made. This is in our DNA. We like to "work" things up in our mind, lock them up and give the boys a chance to unlock them.

Needless to say boys are so straightforward they can't tell through the manipulation. They can be goddamn CEO's, astronauts, physicists and Formula one racers but they can never, never, never get to what's on a girls mind. Which is the point of the whole fight. "So you can't figure me out? Is this how much you love me?" - This sentence is enough to start a slew of fights. We need no other topic to pimp this fight.

Now ask me what true love is?

True love is the boyfriend blinking blind at the face of manipulative provocations like a puppy dog. Which annoys a girl to no limit since she suddenly feels like her "superpowers" to provoke a fight have vanished. But when the day drains out on her and she knows that she has no one to provoke, she will knock the doors of the boyfriend and ask - "Care for a fight?" (Didn't I say this was a fight club?)

Valentine's Special - Painting the town red (but in stealth mode)

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I am bloody impressed at how that was possible - courting each other secretly. Or was it? For some weird reason, no one asked if we were dating each other. Either it was more than apparent that we were dating or people just didn't give a shit. I believe it is the latter. Let's give some cred to people's intellect here, ok?

I am also bloody impressed at how a shockingly routine life suddenly turns into a dreamy doe eyed fantasy. (Ok I stretched that too far, but you get the point). After all all that notion of thunderstorms, violins, misty clouds etc. must have flourished sometime in an alternate universe, to be depicted so incessantly in movies. Three cheers to Bollywood!

Darting around the town in stealth mode was a piece of cake. We had a strict code of conduct. No sheepish looks. No affectionate glances. No flirtatious glint in the eye. Hell, we could totally come across as two strangers, if we wanted. We just raised our cloaks up and walked around all day like Sherlock Holmes and Watson. And if anyone asked we could always tell - "We are pals, chilling out. As pals do."

We shamelessly dodged every invitation from friends who wanted to hangout with us. (Of course, I can tell you this was so easy-peasy because we didn't really have that many friends to boot in the first place)
Parents can wait. Bosses can wait. Work can wait. Bills can wait. Eating can wait. Sleep can wait.

Only meeting could not wait.

I picked up life lessons along the way...

Lesson 1: I can text at the speed of light. Also I will draft texts when I get a gap of about 1 min (when either of us is on a bathroom visit)

Lesson 2: I am capable of being a multitasker. I can watch TV, text live commentary to boyfriend and fake-hear my dad talking all at one go.

Lesson 3: I can drive my bike fast - Out of a work meeting and in a movie theatre in mere minutes.

Lesson 4: I can tell NO. No to meetings, no to wedding invites, no to boss, no to parents. Life is a lot more productive now.

Lesson 5: I can take pleasure in little things. Boyfriend got me a chocobar today, a pan pizza from a hole-in-the-wall food joint and corn from the guy who was tired of seeing our faces everyday. Life is rocking right now.

Lesson 6: I can watch nonsensical movies and still be in a happy mood.

Lesson 7: I can make incredibly silly faces and still look sexy.

Lesson 8: I can bitch to my heart's content and not wait for someone's approval since I am always right.

Lesson 9: I can be an arrogant, manipulative, cynical bitch and still be "cute" and "influential"

Lesson 10: I can throw caution to the wind and become fully independent. I have gangster backing now. Boyfriend = gangster. He will help me procure books, pirated software, street food, movie tickets, mp3's - all the essential things that I cannot afford to compromise.

However like all good things must come to an end, the facade of reality crumbles as soon as you are through this phase. And that is why they say - Enjoy till it lasts.

Disclaimer: I do not take any responsibility of your well-being if you choose to follow some of the "life lessons" above. Strictly, at your discretion. Because, who knows, your boyfriend might not turn out to be quite the gentleman you thought he would be.

Valentine's Special - A little Yin and a Little Yang

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So the earlier post did not go down. That is a good sign. I got the seal of boyfriend approval today morning. Yay. Happy Valentine's Day everyone :-) I can't exactly say may you have more and more boyfriends/girlfriends. But I said it already...

Also, props to Googlers who made this. Love it!

Anyhoo*

Do you know what the best part of early days of dating is? You do not have to be at your best behavior. That's right. You can follow that advice all your friends and teachers wrote in your "autograph book" when you left school -

"Be Yourself"

(I never, till date, understood what that is supposed to mean. Did they mean to say, stop being fake and grow up? That was the most controversial statement of my school life.)

Be Yourself.

So for instance, I could giggle a lot (I think I cackled more than giggle) and get away with it. If you didn't know how annoying it is for the opposite person while you are giggling unnecessarily, next time please take that table by a group of teenage girls sporting Beiber shirts and polka dotted nail paint)

I could eat a hell lot and it would still be "cute".  I could just come in an old jeans and t-shirt and still appear so "chilled out". Obviously, I unashamedly milked this vantage point.

However, one thing led to another and from our behaviors, I could only conclude that we happened to be dangerously opposite in nature. But I was completely confused. What if either or both of us were not acting "genuine"? Allow me to explain.

Take 1:

I hated shopping. I still do. My idea of shopping is to scan the entire floor of apparel and after careful thought, price comparison and optimization, pick exactly one (ok maybe two on a bright day) piece and go home. Also, this one piece will be a regular looking garment (read jeans, boy t-shirt or a cardigan).

Whereas my boyfriend was totally taken by the idea of shopping. As if his life depended on it. He would scan the entire floor nevertheless, but pick pieces that will blow your mind and you will stand there like an idiot, watching him mix and match like a magician.

Needless to say, it made me uncomfortable and insecure. This thing - shopping- is supposed to be a girl's home turf.

Take 2:

I wasn't any pious. Heck, if you had me get up and take bath on a religious day, you should feel lucky. I imagined guys were like that. Not generally pious and all such good things. So imagine my surprise when I see my guy do elaborate rituals as if his full time job was that of a priest. Not only that, but he often felt generous and explained (very patiently) about these rituals.

What could that mean to me? Embarrassing yes. Cute no. Admiration maybe. But the top of it all was this - is he manipulating me into following these things? Is he or is he not?

Take 3:

A vegetarian and a foodie don't belong. Him - vegetarian, Me - foodie (that means non-vegetarian).

If you want to tell me that a vegetarian can also be a foodie...well then...Y.A.W.N

So when the noble priest and rockstar shopper orders a vegetarian dish, what do you do? You order the exact opposite of course. No compromise. And also go overboard about how much you love animal parts. Bheja Fry. Liver Fry. Paya. You know talk about "hardcore" stuff.

The good thing was I didn't have to share my food. The bad thing was I was eating from his plate.

Did he think I was a glutton? Did he think I could strangle him one day for food? Very confusing again.

And inspite of all the forces against us, evil eyes and wagging tongues of people whom we didn't care or seem to notice, we sticked together. Why? Because it was epic! Little yin and a little yang.

And also because his "About me" on Orkut profile read "I keep the drama at the door". He got me there.

*No, that wasn't a typo. Anyhoo is the "cooler" way of saying Anyhow.  Refer Tobias Funke from Arrested Development.

Valentine's Special - The day we met and sparks didn't fly

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Happy Valentine's Week friends :-)

If you are surprised at why I am so jolly good about Valentine's week (yes I am celebrating the whole damn week, because I wish so..its a free country ok?), don't ask. I am surprised as well.

Let's just say I am in mood and move on now. Lately, I have been at war with my boyfriend and I think it is the perfect time to make up to all the shit I throw at him. So being the generous girlfriend I am, I will gift him something from my heart. (Also, because he wants nothing short of a BMW and I cannot afford one right now I will be the eternal frugal girl that I am and hence all the pre-hype about "something from my heart").

So I thought I would just write one post a day, the entire week, about our burgeoning romance from the yesteryears (yes it has been THAT long) and dedicate them to him. Also I cannot guarantee you if this will happen - I might take down the posts if my boyfriend happens to object to this sudden feeling of blog-charity. So consider yourself lucky if you read it in time. Ahem.

I cannot tell you how our love just keeps growing and multiplying over the years. (I am not getting the right cliche to throw in here. Sigh.)

But I can tell you this - It wasn't the proverbial love at first sight. Which thoroughly disappointed me later, when I confessed love, because all my fantasy about love at first sight hadn't come true. It shattered my whole belief system in "love-at-first-sight" fantasies I had as a young girl. Also, I don't believe in fairy tales anymore as a result.

The day we met was rather a dull day. No thunderstorms. No rains. No voilins. Not even bloody good food. DULL. DULL. DULL.

I was working as usual (What did you think? This is what people do in real life. Work. Not dance around trees and think about love fantasies). A common friend of ours had mentioned that he was in the same premises as my work. Which did not the least bit interest me in any way. I mean he was merely an existence till then. I knew him, he knew me. Vaguely. Yawn.

So I just had to be nice and all, like I always am. Also I was bored but obviously I was not going to tell him that. I shot an email into the cloud (I had to throw in the word "cloud". It is the most hip word to use in Silicon Valley right now). And then I sat nibbling and day dreaming (those are clear indication of work boredom). I checked Orkut and re-checked Orkut and kept doing so in intrevals of 5 minutes. (Ya Facebook didn't exist then. Orkut was all the hope we got back then).

And then the email reply happened. Of course, who could resist a charming email from me. Right?

Wrong.

Little did I expect an email reply that read something like this - "I am not sure if I have time to meet...blah blah blah..". Yes I did not care to read the rest of it because I was Jesus freaking mad at him.

What the what? No time? No time for me? A BITS Pilani graduate? (I will forgive your ignorance now, think of BITS as the Ivy League of India).

I am BITS fucking Pilani graduate! And this guy, of all the nerve, rejects me over email?

On second thoughts, I always think that was a classic move on his part. Playing "hard to get" is a classic classic move my boyfriend. Very classic.

But back to the moment. He rejected me!

Oh ya, sparks of a different kind were definitely flying. So I risked signs of desperation and sent him another email. Very subtle about how it can be "a quick chat over the rooftop - nothing of importance - would be nice to catchup"

On second thoughts, #FAIL. Very non-classy of me. I regret till this day.

So what followed was not a quick chat. Instead we had more than an hour long chat. Didn't I tell you I was charming? No make it lethal. I used to be lethal.

What did I tell you? No sparks. No love at first sight. But the longest, soul-stirring (ok not really but insert some profound word here), chat-sy chat of epic proportions ensued...till the cloud (the real cloud, like, up in the sky cloud) disappeared and gave in to the moon and stars and it was time to drive back home.

I mean, how romantic, longest chat ever on the first day ever of a brewing romance. It was nonsense, gossip, silly and profound, intellectual and highly enlightening at the same time. And yet I vaguely remember what the chat was about.

In other news, boyfriend thinks he might want an Ipad. I will ask him to wait till "Ipad 3 comes out". Which obviously wont happen by Feb 14. Classic move Manju.